Deserts, Dryness, Dark Nights of the Soul

I hate this place. I hate not knowing things. I'm sure many people do. I hate no absolutes. Recently someone told me that there is nothing in life that is black and white, yet I try to live in a black and white world. As a matter of fact I don't want to live in any other world. I don't need people to tell me to live in gray and I don't need people telling me God is going to teach me something in this. Quite frankly it's the last thing I need. Not sure what I need, if anything, I just feel like there is something missing. I try to find answers to certain things, specifically my faith and questions I find asking from the Bible and yet no one can give me answers. They give me their views and ideas, but who's to say they are right. I'll find 10 other people telling me they are wrong. Then the next question, maybe the next post - why do I feel a need to ask the questions that seemingly have no answers. Why does it matter? How does it help me love God and love neighbor? I'm sure it's important, but why? I am being vague for a reason, because if I were to sit and list all the questions I have, the internet wouldn't have enough space I'm sure.